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Showing posts from July, 2018

Good Bad Jokes

To the guy who stole my antidepressants the other day..... I  hope you’re happy now I used to think I was a tortoise but then I came out of my shell My new kettle is fantastic. It boiled in seconds. I'm gonna try putting water in it next time.

Limericks and Nonsense Poems

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On Limericks Limericks are poems like haiku , a short pithy form, but unlike haiku, the rhythm is more flexible, and they are often amusing, scurrilous, ribald, or even downright obscene. In fact, as it’s a common, low culture form, there are no rules that can’t be broken so long as you stick to metre and rhyme, more or less.  You don’t have to begin on the downstroke, the first beat of the bar, so to speak. You can add syllables, so long as you keep the main rhythm intact. The second word in this limerick is the first stress. A  man  called Car niv orous  Keith Ate a  di et of  chick en and  beef He  washed  in warm ham Dressed  in roast lamb And used  tur key to  white n his  teeth The rhyme scheme is almost always A, A, B, B, A - but that can also be flexible to some extent.  It’s traditional to end with a punchline , but the subject doesn’t have to be comic. This one opens in the middle of a musical narrative: So Johnny said “Bonn

Moral Dilemmas

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The Accident You are an emergency worker that has just been called to the scene of an accident. When you arrive you see that the car belongs to your wife. Fearing the worst you rush over to see she is trapped in her car with another man. She sees you and although barely conscious, she manages to mouth the words “I’m sorry”… You don’t understand, but her look answers you question. The man next to her is her lover with whom she’s been having an affair. You reel back in shock, devastated by what her eyes have just told you. As you step back, the wreck in front of you comes into focus. You see your wife is seriously hurt and she needs attention straight away. Even if she gets attention there’s a very high chance she’ll die. You look at the seat next to her and see her lover. He’s bleeding heavily from a wound to the neck and you need to stem the flow of blood immediately. It will only take about 5 minutes to stop, but it will mean your wife will definitely die. If you tend to your wife ho

The Clothes That You Wear

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They say that the clothes that you wear Say so much about you That walk and the light in your hair They tell your story But we know love isn't a given And we put these rags on And what does good fortune disguise Is is hell or heaven in those eyes? Turns out life's just a cliché In every style and size The seasons go round just the same Full of trite surprises And everything's just what it seems No, there's nothing hidden at all And who, who would you be If you could be anyone Don the mask of a Snapchat selfie Pretending to be twenty one The Romans had bread, they had circuses We have in-app purchases Smart watches and AI If you dare to look up You'll see the sky Turns out life's just a cliché In every style and size The seasons go round just the same Full of trite surprises And everything's just what it seems No, there's nothing missing at all One day you'll open the door And right there in front of you Will be

Ranks

break ranks close ranks come up through the ranks join the ranks (of something) pull rank (on someone) rank and file rank as something rank on someone rise from the ranks rise through the ranks rank above someone rank among something rank someone among something rank someone or something as something rank someone with someone rank with someone or something

Hierarchies

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A class act https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/rank Social Hierarchy in England Feudal Hierarchy England House of Windsor Family Tree http://www.britishroyalfamilytree.com/house-of-windsor/ Descendants of Alfred the Great Royal Family Tree (849 - Present) https://www.britroyals.com/royaltree.asp https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/1835/6621/products/european-royal-family-tree_1024x1024@2x.png?v=1515008925 Church of England Hierarchy Royal Navy Officer Rank Insignia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_Navy_officer_rank_insignia World War 2 Allied Officers Rank Insignia http://dailyinfographics.eu/world-war-2-allied-officers-rank-insignia/ ALL RISE https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tN9EC3Gy6Nk British Political Hierarchy  Hierarchy of British Education NHS Hierarchy International Corpor